Top ten tips for remaining psychologically resilient

• Tip 1: Maintain a social support
• Tip 2: Maintain a third place
• Tip 3: Get involved
• Tip 4: Keep a boundary between your personal and work life
• Tip 5: Know your early signs of stress
• Tip 6: Get physically active
• Tip 7: Practise deep breathing
• Tip 8: Reduce self-criticism
• Tip 9: Get organised
• Tip 10: Practise resilient thinking

Psychological resilience can be defined as the ability to cope with and manage stressors and to “bounce back” from stressful life events. It is vital to understand that resilience doesn’t mean being strong all the time and never experiencing stress. Resilience is about being aware of the psychological impact that stressors are having on you and consciously engaging in activities that help you manage and cope with them.

Major life events, whether they be personal (e.g., relocating for work or a death in the family) or on a societal level (e.g. war, disease, climate change) can stretch your resources, leaving you to adapt to ever-changing circumstances. Although you may not be able to change external circumstances, there are steps you can take that are within your control. Here are some tips to remain psychologically resilient, when faced with things that you don’t have control over:

Tip 1: Maintain a social support network.

It’s much easier to be resilient to the challenges of work and life if you have a solid social support network. Talking about your feelings and having strong connections to your partner, family, friends, and co-workers helps you to be more effective at facing life’s difficulties. It is important to make time for these people, and it is vital to have some meaningful connection to loved ones even if you may not always feel like it. This could include something as simple as a phone call, or going out to parties with friends Technology has made it possible to maintain connections, even when loved ones aren’t nearby.

Tip 2: Maintain a third place.

An important element of being resilient is to have a “third place.” This third place should be in addition to your home (first place) and your workplace (second place). Your third place(s) should be a physical environment where you go to relax, socialise, and/or engage in an interest/hobby. Examples of third places are your gym, local park, library, and so on. When under pressure, we have a natural tendency to spend too much time at work or at home, but it is important to spend time at our third place. The location—or locations—doesn’t matter, as long as you can relax and de-stress here.

Tip 3: Get involved.

It has often been noted that people who get involved in their community, such as through volunteerism, are more resilient than those who do not. By volunteering, a person has likely thought about what is important to them and then spends some time on this activity to feel a sense of purpose and involvement. This could be as simple as chaperoning your child’s field trip, or as demanding as being a board member for a local non-profit. It’s not necessary for you to do volunteer work, but thinking about what activities are important to you, and spending some time engaging in them can build resilience.

Tip 4: Keep a boundary between your personal and work life.

Pressures and problems can come from both your personal and work life. One key strategy to be psychologically resilient is to keep a clear boundary between your work and personal life. You need to have techniques for “switching off” from work so that it doesn’t impinge on your personal life. There are a variety of methods for this, for example by listening to calming music on your commute home or, if you work from home by taking a short walk outdoors after powering down your laptop for the day. Don’t forget, it’s also important not let personal problems have an impact on work. You may not be able to separate each one completely, but something as simple as keeping your work phone or computer off during family time can be a big help.

Tip 5: Know your early signs of stress.

Resilience is not about being strong all the time and never feeling pressure or stress. It’s about knowing when you are starting to feel stressed and using techniques to help keep in control, e.g., deep breathing, exercising, and talking to family and friends about how you are feeling. To help with this it is useful to be aware of what your early signs of stress are. Early signs tend to occur in four areas:

Physical. Generally, more people have some physical signs when they are starting to feel stressed. This can be headaches, neck and shoulder pain, or digestion problems.

Emotional. When under stress, people can feel angry, frustrated and/or have low mood.

Cognitive. When under pressure, people tend not to think effectively so they can become indecisive, forgetful or find it difficult to concentrate.

Behaviour. Behaviour can change; people can lose their temper more frequently or have trouble sleeping.

Tip 6: Get physically active.

Physical health has an important connection to mental health, including psychological resilience. One important way of maintaining your resilience is to be active, including cardiovascular exercise, resistance training, and stretching. The key is to find ways to add movement into each day, even if it’s in short bursts—for example, walking, yoga, cycling, or playing sports. Everyday activities like walking to the grocery store, taking the stairs, or doing chores around the house also have benefits. It is important to keep moving when you are feeling particularly stressed. Despite the exhaustion that sometimes comes with stress, continuing to do what you were doing before—perhaps even more—can be helpful. This is especially true when working from home or feeling stuck in the same place for long periods of time.

Tip 7: Practise deep breathing.

Deep breathing is one of the easiest relaxation techniques to master, and it is also one of the most effective in helping you remain calm and resilient. Slow, deep (diaphragmatic) breathing slows down your heart rate, lowers blood pressure and reduces tension in the muscles. Try this simple method:

• Sit comfortably in a chair with good posture, and both feet flat on the floor.
• Close your eyes and place your left palm on your stomach and your right palm on your chest.
• Now breathe slowly in through the nose, and out through the nose without holding your breath at any point.
• Try and expand your stomach as you breathe in and contract your stomach as you breathe out.
• Try to breathe so that only your left palm moves and not your right. Your chest and shoulders should not move as you breathe, only your stomach. Try to remain relaxed and concentrate on breathing slowly.

Tip 8: Reduce self-criticism.

One habit many people have which impacts their resilience is that they are too critical of themselves. Self-criticism often occurs as a voice in our head (sometimes called an internal monologue) which is critical of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviour. Something that is often linked to self-criticism is our tendency to be too critical of others as well. Being less critical of others and ourselves has been shown to boost resilience by reducing negative thoughts.

Tip 9: Get organised.

You may have many activities and tasks to keep track of—both at work and in your personal life. Managing all these tasks can be stressful. So, to be resilient, it is important to have an organisational system that helps you stay on top of things. Specifically, your organisational system should include two major elements, which help you maintain your resilience:

Keep your to-dos “outside of your head.” In other words, you should not rely on your memory to trigger when you should do your actions. It is your organisational system, such as a calendar or written to-do list, that reminds you when to do things. The less you rely on your memory, the better.

Prioritise your tasks. It is helpful to have a clear distinction between tasks which are urgent (that is time dependent and must be performed now, such as taking an important call); and those which are important but can be dealt with at your own pace.

Tip 10: Practise resilient thinking.

A vital element of resilience is perception—how you perceive and think about the challenges that life throws at you. Resilient individuals tend to be good at keeping stressors in perspective so that they aren’t overwhelmed by them. Likewise, resilient individuals focus on problem solving. To practise resilient thinking, focus on solutions, not problems and the feelings those problems generate. An analogy of resilient thinking that is often used is, ‘when you have fallen into a hole, your thinking should be about how to climb out of the hole not how you fell into it or how unlucky you are to be in the hole’.

A very useful technique for maintaining resilient thinking is to keep a Gratitude Journal. Every day, you should write in it the things in your life that you are grateful for. By carrying out this activity you are training your mind to focus on positive things which in turn helps you be more resilient.

In your busy life, it may not be possible to implement all these tips. But try to think creatively and it may be possible to combine two or more tips together, such as playing tennis with your partner and/or children. This will enable you to maintain your social support network and spend time on an activity which is important to you while giving you some exercise.

© TELUS Health 2025

Patrick Firth MA, MSW, RSW

Social worker, Senior Clinical Content Writer